Mental illness is exhausting

Tommorrow its mental health awareness week 2018 #MHAW18 and before I start I wanted to just make a post acknowledging this very important thing. Mental illness is exhausting and feeling mentally tired is so underrated and under talked about. When you have a mental illness you have to battle your brain each day. It's almost like theres a bully living inside your head and its there contantly, feeding you lies or making you believe things which isn't true in reality. Fighting these, telling the voice inside your head that it is wrong is exhausting. If the thoughts are too loud that you cant fight them, it takes over and then panicking is exhausting. Performing safety behaviours is exhausting. It makes life feel so complicated as if theres always hundreds of obstacles or problems you have to over come and trying to solve them all inside your head takes all your mental strength. On the days where things are too much and you just sit in bed, those days take it all too because its using everything you've got left to not give up. Mental illness can cause so much damage to your body physically and mentally that sometimes even if you are feeling more recovered you still have to live with the long term effects your ILLNESS has caused. Then accepting those effects whether that is physically, emotionally or socially , then re-accepting it the next day because the thing is with being mentally ill is each day feels scary and each feels like you have to start from square one. Just to battle it all over again. Then recovery, it honestly brings out more mental strength than you know you have inside of you. Being able to stay at a 'in recovery' level and not relapse is exhausting. Its not, and never will be as simple as 'being mentally ill, getting treatment, being fixed'. You are fighting for your life and YOU should be so proud of yourself for that. Everything you feel is valid, everything you're scared of is a genuine fear that you are allowed to feel and if you oppose that feeling once, if you beat it even one time then you need to congratulate yourself for that. Little steps, take one thing at a time, you are doing so good, please please keep going

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